Friday, November 13, 2009

Moments Like These


I love when I learn something new! Don't you??

Things I learned (I would say today, but I keep learning every day!) :

1. How to create a new blog background (Thank you Katy!!)

2. Each time I start the chemo, life with Sutent gets a little easier.

3. My willpower is stronger than I realized.

4. I love cauliflower...cooked not raw.

5. How much I think about my new niece is astonishing!

6. To remember that in each stride I take I am improving.


I started the Sutent again on Sunday, November 2nd. Considering how life with this chemo has been going I felt super positive that making the adjustment from break to chemo would be even easier than the last time. Wouldn't you know that my spirit has proved me right yet again! I am feeling good while living in the moment. As for the rough patches....I have limitations. I am still getting used to them, but I am accepting it.

Visualize with Sean and I - see the Sutent Warriors attacking the little ASPS tumors. I truly believe that each day they are doing something great. Which is good because I still have a lot of living to do with all of you!

Still no word (not that I am calling and asking head-quarters) from Dr. Benjamin's office about when I will see them next. I can feel a December appointment full of Banana/Berry Barium tests coming, but I will let Mda schedule me. No need to ruin my turkey taste-buds just yet.

I am still getting ready for my first ArtWalk. I am really excited about it. I have already sold 3 pieces this past month!! I would love for you to come. It'll be in the evening on Saturday, November 28th at Gracies on the Strand.



Thank you for your continuous prayers and support!

CARPE DIEM!

Monday, October 26, 2009

Feeling Fine

Days of rain and I am still feeling good. No headaches or tummy aches or nausea. No sleepless nights or special diets.
I am feeling good. These past two weeks I have not been on the chemo because I really needed to stop, take a break, and let myself heal. Months of this every day can really start to wear on you. My poor feet were beginning to take a toll too. One might also agree that work, art classes, tutoring after school, and volunteering might make this harder on me too. One may wonder how I have any time for Sean or my friends and family. They come first. Then work. Then everything else. Though if you know me I know that means I have seemed to have left myself out of the picture again. I really do better though, not focusing on myself too much. Yes, I know I need to take care of myself. And I do. I accept help too when needed. So this break has been most positive.

I would be lying if I said I was looking forward to starting chemo again on Sunday. BUT I am looking forward to targeting those little monsters and letting the medicine work its magic.

I do not have a date set on when I am to have tests and results. Dr. B is out of the country until the end of this week. I will keep you posted.


Thank you so so so much for your continuous prayers. It helps keep me going when I am not feeling my best.


Rain or Shine - CARPE DIEM!!

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Enjoying The Fall Weather



I am feeling pretty good this month. I am still on the same chemo. My results are still positive. I don't have a date for my next appointment, but it shouldn't be until November. So I am just trucking along. I'm working every day and still teaching art on the weekends. In fact, my personal art is going to be at Gracie's for the November 28th Artwalk. I am so excited!!!
Sean and I are just taking it day by day and enjoying the simplicities that life has to offer. I think that is the easiest thing you can do when life is full of possibilities. I see a hopeful, full of "every thing great" future, but until then, I am making the most of the super now that I am in.
I also do not have to take Lyrica for the nerve pain anymore. My knee feels a little tight now and then, but I don't notice it for the most part and I am still walking pretty well. I can almost kinda run too!! I am getting excited about that!!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Perspective

I came home to an empty house around 8pm smiling. Not smiling because it's empty! Sean and Priesty are working out of town this weekend. But smiling because I could feel the accomplishments. I felt this feeling all over....I had heard from my doctor and gotten good results, jr junior leaguers training event was amazing tonight, I had a wonderful day with my students today (though they are pretty wonderful every day), my art is going to be in Gracie's for Art Walk, I'm teaching art lessons, and I didn't have any more laundry piles (well who's looking in the hamper anyway)....and the more I thought about everything the more I smiled as I realized that it might have been some time since I had thought about all the positive things in my life. I am taking chemo and I am still moving on. Still striving for a cure. Still living life, still walking on my own, still smiling. I knew that I was also smiling because I hadn't stopped to think about it more and I knew I needed too. Things can pile up on you. Kind of like dirty laundry piles. You might have a pile of work, a pile of volunteer agendas, a pile of cleaning, a pile of medical bills, a pile of regular bills....and before you know it those piles can be so overwhelming. What I hope that you are doing now is thinking about all the positives in your life. And if you can't name 3 right now off the top of your head then you need to look at your bracelet that says Positivity is Power. And if you don't have one of those bracelets, then you need to call me so I can send you one.
I had labs on Saturday and talked with Mara, Dr. B's nurse, today via email. I had had a phone conference with her on Tuesday about the labs, but of course I forgot to ask any and every question...just a few important to name -what were the results of my lab work, why do I have to see Dr. B next week (this was unplanned), am I having more testing....you might be wondering now what was Amanda saying to her on the phone if she didn't get any of this information. I had only been thinking that she would tell me to continue chemo into month five because my levels were good. But her first question sent me to la la land. She asked if I was still on chemo. Or rather what I found out later was that Dr. B wanted to know if I was. And what I later found out (when I talked to her again) was... he wanted to know if I was still on chemo because my labs looked really good. He knew that I had been sick all of last week from some kind of cruddies, but my levels were still fine. That is awesome! And the reason he wants to see me next week is because he will be gone until October 25th and he wants new scans for chest, abdomen, and pelvis. OK. This is good. So on Thursday the 17th, I will have my stint in my ureter changed out, have x-rays, labs, full body barium swallowing CT scans, and meet with Dr. B.
But for now, I will return emails, make coffee for tomorrow, pick up my sweet little Chopper who is asleep on the floor next to me and go to bed! Oh, and take my chemo of course. After all, chemo does a body good!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Looking Great

I am laying down. Compliments of my sweet sis Jeni for letting me use her laptop right now. I am thinking that if I invested in one of these I might have told you sooner that I saw Dr. B last Tuesday. Yes, Last week! And it was super great news even. He said that my labs came back great. He looked at me, smiled and said "You really look great." And then he said that.....he tumors are shrinking once again. YIPPEE!!!!!!! Shrink away little mongrels! Next time not only do I get to go for labs anytime on a Sunday, he will call me with the results. That will be on September 6th. How awesome would that be if we just continued that path...good news, labs on Sunday, then doctor visit via phone conference? I am so excited to see that we have already come this far. I am into month 3 and though I am busy with JJL, setting up my classroom, baby shower galore, teaching art classes, and tutoring I am finding plenty of time to take breaks and rest.
As for energy or increasing lack of... Dad suggested that I eat more potassium and drink more electrolytes and Jess helped me find some good things to add to my diet at the store. I think this will help give me the strength I need to keep fighting the good fight. I had noticed that I was tiring out much easier these days so between the food and the rest....I should be moving along in the right direction.
Well, It is officially time for me to stop fighting the closing of my eyes.
Rain or shine tomorrow, Carpe Diem!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

The Journey Continues

We met with Dr. B today. I think we got out of there in record time.....our parking fee was *only* $9 and we saw Dr. B at 10ish (our appt time was 9). That's good! These appts usually involve a much longer wait. I don't even want to think about what he has to say to the patients he sees before me. Say an extra prayer for Jackie. I met her in the waiting room this morning and she has Dr. B too. She was waiting to be admitted for round 2 today. She has MFH Sarcoma. She was diagnosed on Mother's Day. She's a mom, a wife, a friend, a sister, and even an attorney for Walmart in Arkansas and she's a fighter (a survivor). She is going to make it - I just know it!

Dr. B said the results showed that my tumor was "not better and not worse....just fine". He went on to say that he couldn't say much about my tumors. He said they are so lazy, dormant, that it is truly hard to see the activity level. They could be dead and that would be awesome!! We really need to stay on the Sutent and wait and see what is happening to them. It will take time...I have lots of it! We will still continue this chemo even after he is sure about those tumors because we need to make sure that nothing else grows. He said that he really needs to keep watching these tumors. Remember, they grow slow and they are shrinking away slowly too. He also decided that I don't need to take a break from the Sutent. I will continue to take the same dose every day with no stops in between. I will also start seeing him every four weeks so he can see how I am doing and how the tumors are doing. I will see him again after the 1st of August.

Thank you so much for your prayers! Keep 'em coming!!
POSITIVITY IS POWER!!!!!!!!!

Monday, July 6, 2009




So I found yet another perk about Mda....when you do not have a working computer at home, use the one at Mda! We have a virus on ours and we haven't been home much to fix it. The whole thing is a mess right now, but I'll work on it some day this week for sure....unless I have any volunteers to come sit at my computer and talk with Microsoft, Norton, and Comcast to fix it.....no - no takers to do that and I understand completely.
Anyhoo....here I am. It's testing day. I had labs and x-rays earlier and now Sean and I are hanging out till our 2:30pm CT appt. I'll come again tomorrow morning to see Dr. B for the results. I feel like he will say that everything is running on course as it should be. I am almost finished with the 1st month's dosage of Sutent and hopefully my white blood cell count comes back great so that I can continue on to the second month. I am positive it will!
Speaking of Positivity is Power, let me tell you about camp!! For those of you that were there with me....ice cream and cake, ice cream and cake, now slip slip slip slide, slip slip slip slide......Needless to say, I had the most amazing journey at Camp 4 All with the Rainbow connection. You really HAVE to go to www.rccamp.org to see this. The staff was amazing (but camp 4 rocked it out!!!!), and the kiddos were incredible! The rainbow connection just celebrated it's 25th year of taking kids 6-15 that have cancer, blood disorders, or are siblings of those that do. And the camp is the coolest ever!! Thanks to so many amazing sponsors, these kids get to have one of the most amazing weeks of their lives. And most of them come back year after year....and I met 2 of the sweetest counselors that were campers then Jr counselors and now counselors! Along the way, I made some of the most amazing campers and counselors and made some pretty neat new friendships. When I say that I can't wait for next year, I mean that I really can't wait for next year. Janis asked if she could give out my Positivity bracelets to campers and staff. WOW!!! So every time someone was "caught" stargazing....just kidding....being or doing something positive, she would give them a bracelet and yes, by the end of the week, everyone had one!!!! I really hope they will do that next year.
Will email again tomorrow after I see Dr. B.

Carpe Diem!!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Kumbaya




Morning! I can tell it's going to be another great day in the neighborhood!! I'm up pretty early drinking coffee. I'm usually up early, but I am not usually awoken to a charlie-horse in my left calf. Ouch! I had to fall asleep with cramps in my right foot last night too. I can't assume this is the doings of chemo....it might have been the huge pecan pie with icecream and whipped cream that I helped Sean and Nona eat last night. I am a good helper when it comes to finishing desserts. I have to admit that being on chemo will make you scrutinize every abnormality and often has the makings of a hypacondriact. So if it happens once in a while; no worries. Let's HOPE that experience is only on occasion. I did forget about the terrible, vivid dreams though. Whew!! I am glad this one wasn't true because I'd have to tell Sean that someone stole our mower out of our garage again.......Never mind all that. I am happy to be up. And I owed a completion on my last post too. Did you know that Relay for Life and The Rainbow Connection are both celebrating 25 years?! That is amazing!!!!! The Rainbow Connection has a camp and I met some pretty neat ladies when I was attending the Relay meetings, Heidi, Lisa, Janis, Christy and they invited me to be a volunteer counselor at the camp this summer. Of course I jumped at that chance. I loved camp as a kid (Heart of the Hills - go Shawnee Power!!!!) and I always wanted to be a counselor, but I just never had the full time. Needless to say, I am super excited!!! This camp has the kiddos ages 6-15 from Utmb. They either have cancer, blood disorders, or are a loved one of one that does. Here, they are just a camper. Doing things that campers do. And because people donate every year, they get to go the whole week for less than $50! I love it! As I write this I am envisioning myself wearing all white like we did on Sundays at camp Heart singing Kumbaya(cum-by-ya)......check out this site http://www.rccamp.org/camp/ Camp Location: Camp for All in Burton, Texas. Camp for All is a facility built especially for individuals with special needs.
Camp Activities: Fishing, swimming, canoeing, archery, riflery, horseback riding, arts and crafts, challenge course, sports, all-camp dance, talent show, campfires, music, cook-outs, nightly activities, awards and many other activities.

Countdown -2 weeks away!!!

So many of you wrote me back from yesterday's post. Wow! I love you all!! Thank you so much for your incredibly sweet, kind, loving, inspiring words. It really MEANS so much to me always and every time. I have saved every sweet word. It helps me tremendously to look over those encouraging words on those days that I am not feeling my best. Thank you so much.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Stopping and Starting

Over the last couple of months, I have probably sat down to write no less than 9 times. But I either felt like I had nothing to say or that I had so much to say and not enough time or energy to write it. Now I feel like I have plenty to say....Those of you that know me pretty well know that if you haven't heard from me that I am doing well. Really, its not much different from you...if you aren't calling me regularly or popping into my classroom...if you don't work right across the hall from me....you aren't going to know all the nitty gritty details. Those details are small ones. I am still feeling so blessed. So what that ALLLLLLLL of my hair turned white. We dyed it. I can't eat much at one time or anything spicy, acidic, must be careful, blah, blah, blah. And I am a master of fatigue and nausea most days. And I guess I'm going to sit in front of a special light for the rest of my life so that my skin will feel healed. If that's it....I can handle it, and good thing too since Dr. B says I'm likely to be on this chemo for a long time. Long time....I thought he meant a year or 5. No, he means a long time. So I am not going to think about more than five years from now. I can't stroll through life focusing on five years from now when tomorrow can change everything. Day by day. Day by day, I say. Dr. B doesn't actually know how long I'll be on this. I just pray each day that it is working and that it continues to work. I honestly don't care as long as it does and I get to live well past retirement. Remember, I have plans. I want children (PLEASE call me and I'll come play with yours!!! I love them!) I want grandchildren, I want to see my friend's kids grow up. I am getting ready to be an Aunt and I want to see this little munchkin get married, have children too. I want to enjoy my teacher retirement....darn it they take enough out of my salary each month as it is. :) So, a long time on chemo = a lot more memories. Interesting, I am wearing my survivor shirt that I got from Relay today. That's good I think. I need to tell you about Relay for Life (how it went) and about camp.
Let me first say that I am feeling like a survivor every day. And I started what we created to be Round 3 last night. So far, I have been on chemo for 2 months at a time with 2 week breaks in between. Dr. B said I can't just stay on it, that my body has to heal some. My white blood cell count was 2.2, so we stopped to take a break. Worked out fine since I had literally run out of chemo and had spent the past two weeks working on getting it. See with the very first chemo that I was on nearly two years ago, I saw Dr. B before I actually took my chemo and I took it there (remember chemo in a bag girl). But now since it comes in the mail (go UPS), it's different. I don't see him before each dose. And they are so busy over there, naturally, that its hard to connect at times. Ok, and I am super busy too. :) I don't have another doctor appointment until July 6th. It's been a month since my last one and all that was said, I already mentioned above. I did also see plastic surgery and I got my "graduation papers", though I might go back and have fat taken out from another area (don't try to donate, I have plenty) and injected on my right side. My skin is pretty thin along that incision and I often have pain from clothes rubbing it wrong and what not. But I am still thinking about it so we will see.
Ok, RELAY FOR LIFE WAS A HIT!!!! Funny how it rained everywhere but at Moody that night. So a lot of people didn't make it and some people there had to leave, but over all, I had a blast. Our team alone raised over $2,000!!!!!! GO TEAM!!!!!! And I can't wait for next year already! I do think that a lot of people didn't know about this, so I plan to do my part in helping make sure that everyone knows more about what it entails and just how much fun (I danced the night away with my goofy steps and even won musical chairs at 3am...though I think the kid was too afraid of knocking me down and let me win, hee hee!) it is. It is amazing to see how many lives are touched by cancer in one way or another. It is amazing to see how everyone comes together under the stars and Relays. Relays for more birthdays to be had, Relays for cures, Relays for my life, your life, their life. Mark your calendars...it will be in April next year. Actual date? I'll let you know when I find out.
For now, I must go...I need to take out my famous WS Banana Nut Bread from the oven and then go meet a student for his tutoring session. But I'll be back....today. And I will tell you all about Rainbow Camp. I get to volunteer as a counselor for the cancer kids at UTMB. There they get to be a kid, just a kid having a blast at camp. It's my first time and I can't wait....look I am already rambling on about this. I really must go. I can smell the bread calling my name!!
Carpe Diem!!
Positivity is Power! ALWAYS!!!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Positive Singing

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

Good Morning! Even in the rain, it's a good morning....
Feeling good today.
A good friend, Lica, sent me this the other day and I really think its something everyone should see if you haven't already.

Talk about Positivity is Power.

Speaking of......the Relay for Life event is this coming Friday, the 24th. If you haven't visited the site and you want to sign up for team Positivity is Power 2 or to make a donation to either Positivity is Power, Positivity is Power 2, or to buy a luminaria; please go to http://www.relaygalveston.com/. The deadline to do this on Tuesday the 21st. They have asked me to speak at the event and begin the reading of the luminarias. I am honored. I just have to tell my story. I think I can do that and if I picture everyone to be 6 or 7 like my first grade class, I think I'll do fine.

So, we are into week five of Sutent. I am truly feeling good. I don't think you would ever know if you saw me. The pain and nausea is so infrequent and I am doing a pretty good job staying on a schedule...something I've never been super at. Eating is nothing exciting these days...same cereal in the morning, same PB & J sandwich for lunch, and something different but safe for dinner. Its worth it though! I think that helps a lot and so does all the rest I am getting too. I don't see Dr. B until the 12th and I am hoping that I will be feeling as well as I do now so that I won't need to take any breaks.

Love and thanks to all!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

From the Daily News


This left me speechless.


From the Galveston Daily News –


Relay For Life is still here after Hurricane Ike By Lisa Velasquez Contributor



Published April 12, 2009 GALVESTON — I’m a cancer survivor. I’ve beaten the odds, and I just marked 10 years of being cancer-free.This past year, I learned another important survivor lesson, as did so many of us who call Galveston home.I’m a survivor of a different kind now — there are so many of us who lost so much, including hope, Sept. 13.But we’re strong people. We didn’t give up. We began rebuilding, not just our lives, but rebuilding hopes — as we work toward the return of our beloved island.We hope for a better tomorrow. So does the American Cancer Society in its fight against cancer.Thirteen regional divisions and local offices in 3,400 communities and millions of volunteers, including everyone involved with Relay For Life, are building hope.I’m proud to support the ACS by participating in Relay For Life, the No. 1 nonprofit fundraising activity in the world, celebrating its 25th anniversary.The Relay kicks off with a celebration of cancer survivors.There are more than 9 million cancer survivors in the world today, and we honor those courageous people in our community.This year, Frank Billingsley, of KPRC-TV in Houston, will be on stage to celebrate our survivors and kick off the official first lap.The Survivor lap has always held special meaning for me.It reminds me of why I became involved in Relay: to celebrate the fact that I’m still on Earth, even after I heard those three dreaded words, “You have cancer;” also to honor my husband, who was fighting cancer at the time and lost his battle.That lap reminds me that it’s possible to inspire others through actions, that what I do as a cancer survivor may impact another person who might be beginning their fight. Never underestimate the power actions can hold to someone who needs to hear “It’s going to be OK. You’re not alone.”The most moving and memorable part of Relay For Life is the Luminaria Ceremony, beginning at dusk.Survivors and those we’ve lost are honored at this unique ceremony.Paper bags bearing the names of loved ones line the track, filled with sand and a candle.The overhead lights are dimmed, and names of those lost to the disease are read aloud.These beautiful tributes provide hope that we can find a light in the darkness that is a cancer diagnosis.Relay is a family-friendly activity, with games, fundraisers and entertainment.I’m urging the entire Galveston community — whether you live, work or volunteer here — to join us at Relay For Life of Galveston Island at 6 p.m. April 24 at Moody Gardens.It provides an opportunity for the community to join as one in the fight against cancer.Celebrate hope right here on Galveston Island.If you can’t attend, please consider a donation in support of this event.For information, visit relaygalveston.com.Cancer doesn’t stop for a hurricane. Neither can we.Lisa Velasquez lives in Galveston.

Friday, April 10, 2009

It's Been A While

I haven't written anything in a while. Don't worry, the chemo is DEFINITELY still working!!! So much seems to be going on around me that I find myself "sucking it up" and trying to help problem solve for others. I have friends who have babies who are at Texas Children's and I have friends whose parents are dying and I have friends whose lives are still ripped apart from Ike. As cheesy as it may sound....they need my positivity mixed in with their own. And I am happy to have the energy to give. So I find my self going to work, going home or visiting with these friends, and going to bed.
No I have not been on Chemo for 4 months. Dr. Benjamin was hoping for that, but my little engine that can sort of steamed out for a while there. Beginning of March some weird things happened. At that point I had been on this Sutent for nearly two months and my body had decided it had enough. And I am not talking about my hair that turned white. Interesting and quite freaky, but fixable. No, my blood pressure dropped very low and my face and chest turned a pinky red and I was VERY grumpy, TIRED, and sick. So we stopped for 3 weeks. And after a few days I felt great. I went to South Lake Tahoe with family and I had a blast. I was able to sleep and eat normally....and I drank like a good little catholic would too! By March 20th I was ready to start this Sutent again. My body, mind, and spirit had truly healed and I wasn't so scared since I then knew what to expect. One day at a time, right? That's the way to do it. I don't worry about the side effects. I think if you think about them too much, it will surely happen. Positive thinking remember?
So here we are.....week 4. I love my hair. It's like brown then white, then brown. I'll have to fix that before Easter services. I can't have the Cardinal seeing that. Hee Hee. So far for the most part I have been fine. I can tell when I have over done it though. At school this week, we had ITBS testing and we also made Easter bags and dyed eggs and had an egg hunt and....and...and. So needless to say by Thursday I was wiped out. This weekend is pretty full too, but I plan to rest in between.
RELAY FOR LIFE!!!! This is on April 24th! Please join my teams. Positivity is Power and Positivity is Power 2. I met this sweet young guy (well not yet in person) named Chris Sanderson. He is so positive and enthusiastic and he was recently diagnosed with RHABDO Sarcoma. He is a police officer down here and he is still working in between his treatments. Well, he is just a joy to talk to. Kind of reminds me of a younger version of me. He is on the Relay for Life team too. Just another reason you'd want to be apart of this. Go to www.relaygalveston.com to see more info about this incredible event. Think of survivors you know. And of those that you hold a special place for in your heart for they lost their own fight. This is whi this event is for. Finding the cure. Fighting the cancer. Supporting the cause. Really, thank you so much for all of your donations and support. Thank you for wearing my bracelets too! That means so much to me!!Your power and enthusiasm is half the battle and in my "darkest hour" it helps keep me fighting.
I go back to the doctor on the 12th of May. I will have more testing to see how this chemo is working and also an MRI on my right thigh. I have these severe pains in it and the CT didn't show anything. It may be a phantom nerve and it only happens when I am on the chemo (I never once had the pain during the 3 week break). So hopefully this will tell us more. For those of you that have to drink 2 tall bottles of barrium......try mixing the berry and banana flavors. Seriously! I have had enough barrium parties to say that mixing it helps it go down so much easier.
Till then,
CARPE DIEM!

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Really, I must say that I can't believe I haven't written that............

THE CHEMO IS WORKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The tumors are visually shrinking. I will continue chemo for 2 to 6 more months....no breaks. Just a pill....every night....for the next 2 to 6 months.
I have been on a roller coaster. Sometimes I want to get off the ride. But I want to be cancer free. I want to continue to be cancer free! I remind myself that all the time. I remind myself that when I am rudely awoken (my body) in the middle of the night several times. I remind myself that when the pain is ouch ouch ouch. And I remind myself, when I have to rely on others to help me get through the day. However, when it comes to food......and I do love food...I wish I could remind myself so that I don't eat the things I do. Bland, bland, bland. I must focus on bland. Dr. Benjamin said I can work. I will keep working because I love what I do, I love my students, and I love feeling productive in this crazy world. I can't say much more at this moment. I will write more later. Feel free to ask me questions.

Sunday, January 18, 2009


Thursday I awoke before 5am with a headache. Took two Darvon and went back to sleep. When I woke up about an hour later it was still there, but only a faint trace of it lingered. So I showered and went to work. I had my hair pulled back...as I always do. Its at that weird growing back stage and that can be pretty annoying at times. My headache was getting worse as the morning moved on. I thought it was just the pony tail so I took the band out. When I went to the school nurse to have my daily Blood pressure reading and temp, it was pretty high. By the time my husband came to get me (its a wonder how he didn't get a speeding ticket) my BP had reached 170/110 and my head was pounding worse than I had ever felt in my life! So off to the ER we went.
We went to the Mainland ER. Sean was concerned that MD Anderson was too far away at this point. They took my BP and whew!! It was 206/126. Nope, not good. I told them I was on Chemo and that this was listed as a common side-effect. I am on BP medicine, but the dosage is very low. They gave me demmorrall (spell check that) and phenogren. Instantly my Migraine was going away and my BP went down. They did a CT Scan and an x-ray and all came back fine. I left with instructions to rest over the next couple of days. I have put in a call to Dr. Benjamin's office about raising my BP medicine and the pharmacist suggested that I take one pill in the am along with the one a take at night so that I am at least getting 20mg. What a scary day. And what a head-ache. I have since spoken to Dr. Benjamin and he increased the dosage. He said to really watch my BP for 48 hours and to call him right away if it doesn't go down.
I will keep you updated. Just continue those prayers.
This IS working!! Still visualizing the Sutent to be attacking the tumors.
I also ordered new bracelets. They are pretty close to the same as the ones before, but I got the band to be blue and the phrase to glow so that the band doesn't loose its "luster" so to speak. The phrase Positivity is Power glows in the dark. Why does is glow? Because....in your darkest hour....read those words and know that you are not ever going to be alone in the dark. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how deep that tunnel can get. Always a light. I am selling them for $2. All proceeds go to the Sarcoma Foundation. Please help. I have small, medium, and large. PLEASE help the foundation.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Feeling


Some days are good and some days are not so good. Yesterday was not so good, but today is better. I am 14 days into my Sutent. Still visualizing the attack against my tumors. Yesterday was a day of nausea amongst other things but today is better. You know that feeling you get after you have been feeling so sick and all of a sudden you feel better??? I have that feeling now. Its almost like a high that you get....full of peace and happiness. I can relax. I am happy. I don't like how sad I feel when the medicine makes me feel sick that day. Only 13 more days!!!

I am thankful for my team at school....not just my amazing 1st grade team, but my whole team. I don't know what I would do if they didn't look out for me! I am thankful for my mommy in law who sent me one of those funny snuggly things that you have being seeing on those info-mercials lately. Its pretty cool......and snuggly. I am thankful for my dad who keeps calling me to make sure I am okay and that I am checking my blood-pressure daily. I am thankful that the school nurse does that for me!!! Go Mary! I am thankful for my "back-yard" neighbor for whom I have no idea what I would do without her love and kindness. Her boyfriend is pretty amazing too...he even washed my car the other day! And lastly....Sean. He is doing well. He is having to put up with me. He does so well with the days of ups and downs. He is truly amazing. He makes me laugh. He makes me eat. He makes sure I take my medicine. He checks on me all the time just to make sure I am alive and kicking. He makes me feel loved.

Carpe Diem! Go out there and hug that person that you have been meaning to hug.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

The ZZZZZZZ's

It is almost 2pm. I think the day has strolled along and I can't think of the last time that I was so tired. Baaaam!!! So chemo has finally begun its toll. I am watching as our aid helps with the students. Its loud in here, but incredible. They are learning about the difference (subtraction) as they play banker. I should be so excited, but I am so tired. At this point I am tired of being tired....and its no where close to "hitting the hay" time! I have felt the nausea off and on too, but for the most part, it has been ok.
I know I can keep this up. It is worth it as I continue to visualize the Sutent attacking the tumors. Did I mention that the tumors no longer have names? A sweet friend of mine said that in naming them, you give energy - existence - power. No way are these guys getting anymore of that!!

Friday, January 2, 2009

Tired But Going Strong Into Day 2 1/2

Wow! So I feel better than I thought I would. I am pretty fatigued and have a horrible headache, but I am at work right now and feeling pretty strong. I am even remembering to drink lots of water, eat often, and stay moisturized/hydrated. Compared to other things, this is pretty simple and quite preventative. I am visualizing the Sutent to be attacking the blood vessels that are feeding into the tumors.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Sutent in the Mail

Who knew that chemo could be delivered in the mail?
I started Sutent last night. Its a red and gray capsule. It was very surreal taking it that way. It seems to lesson the blow....the fear....but in the back of my mind I know - it's still chemo. Though this time it will be the cure.
I was confused as you are probably now when Caremark (pharmacy that my insurance uses) called. Dr. Benjamin had figured that we would not be starting until late January because we were waiting on approval from my insurance. Each round last 28 days. I take one pill a day. Cost? Just over $8,000. Thank goodness my copay is only $35. There isn't much that the doctors know about the true side effects from this chemo. They know that it may increase my blood pressure, make me tired/fatigued, nauseous, and that I have to stay away from grapefruit products. Basically, a bland diet and lots of water. I also can't touch hot water. Sean is changing the temp gage on the heater for me.
So how do I feel? Okay so far. Since it can make you tired and and nauseous we decided to start last night as opposed to this morning. I slept fine and I feel fine. I do have medicine that I am taking to keep any unforeseen nausea under control. So each night I will take yet another pill. I finish this cycle on the 22nd and we will see Dr. Benjamin on the 29th instead of the 5th. Speaking of that date....I will be seeing more doctors on that day in Feb. about my stint and my previous surgery.
On a side note:
I have been thinking about my New Years Resolutions. I don't have any yet, but I know that I need to do something about my phone and email. I haven't been great about returning mail or calls since Ike. But I think of you and I know that I owe you a call or better - a visit.